pro tip of the day: THEY DON’T MATTA.

Man, life is so exciting around here, y’all. So many of my friends are engaged, expecting new babies, starting new jobs, moving to new places. There are so many things worth celebrating! It’s so awesome!

But like. Sometimes it’s not. Know why?

Because everyone has an opinion. Opinions regarding your happy times in life that they want you to know. Because they’re under the delusion that they’re important.

My best friend got engaged last week (shout out!) and asked me to be her matron of honor (HOLLA!) so for the past few days we’ve been excitedly chatting about upcoming nuptial-related plans. It’s so much fun, but seriously, we’re already talking about what is “proper” and “polite” and which things we need to make sure we do and which people we need to make sure we consult and invite and blah blah blah because we don’t want to offend anyone.

Likewise, I’m going to a couple of friends’ wedding (is that grammatically correct? Like, my two friends are marrying each other and I’m going to that. Did I say that right? Anyway…) and just today the bride posted a Facebook status about how she was so over trying to please everyone.

This brought back painful memories of planning my own wedding.

Then I remembered being pregnant, and preparing for my child’s birth…

Then I remembered just a couple weeks ago when I was told my kid wouldn’t know who his mom is because of the way I was choosing to parent…

And so on and so on.

Everyone has an opinion about everything, it seems, and, based on my own experiences as well as the experiences of those very close to me, they always feel like voicing them. Even if those opinions hurt.

So. I write this blog today just to say…



So what if your great aunt BethyLou doesn’t want you to invite your cousin BobbyDean to your wedding because he still hasn’t sent her a Christmas card? So what if you co-sleep with your baby and your sister tells you you’re going to murder your child?

So. Freaking. What. They don’t matta!

Now, I’m not saying this is an excuse for you to be a total douche. But at the end of the day, you’re the only person whose opinion really holds weight. Own that. Know that. Be confident in that.

This post is brought to you by my broken GIVE A CRAP button and the exhaustion brought about by being a full time working mom that broke it. Cheers.

tuesday tip — opinions are like…

Those of you who have been following my blog from the beginning know that it didn’t start out as a body image blog. It started out as a creative outlet for me to express my frustrations with working in the broadcast news industry. All of my coworkers who read it found it extremely enjoyable and supremely relatable.

All of my coworkers, that is, except for one.

That one coworker? Well. I can’t say anything nice about her, so I won’t say anything about her at all. (Thanks for the moral upbringing, Bambi!) But, upon finding my blog, she had a lot of things to say about me and none of them were nice. So, naturally, she pulled me into a closed edit bay and barked all of those horrible things at me while I stared at her in disbelief and sobbed.

After this confrontation I crumbled into a thousand pieces. My fragile self-worth fell in on itself. Coworker thinks I’m a horrible person? I thought. Well, then I must be a horrible person! At the time, I never thought I’d see the good in that situation. I thought it would forever remain a painful memory, another tell-tale entry in my Failodex.

The truth of the matter, though? That’s not what happened. While there was, no doubt, a world of trouble that came from that awful edit bay fall out, a whole heap of good came from it, too. That confrontation was the catalyst to me changing the focus of my blog to self-image and being a small part of a huge self-love revolution taking place around me. Because of that, I will be forever grateful to Coworker, no matter how horrible her opinion of me was/is.

There is a long-standing saying about opinions that, as crass at it is, is irrefutably accurate:

Opinions are like [butt] holes. Everyone’s got one and thinks everyone else’s stinks.

I don’t know who the genius was to first make this comparison, but he or she hits the nail right on the head. And, not only does everyone have an opinion, but everyone has an opinion about you. (Oh, and if you think it’s bad now, just wait until you get pregnant. My lifestyle choices and subsequent parenting methods have been criticized by countless people so badly already and my child isn’t even visible yet.)

At any rate, as much as I love the above quote about opinions, I’d like to modify it just a little bit.


It’s no secret that Coworker’s opinion of me was, dare I say, less than favorable. But don’t I know myself better than she does? Shouldn’t my opinion of myself reign supreme?

Yes. Yes it should. And the same goes for you.

Even though everyone has an opinion about you, the truth is that your opinion about yourself is the only one that matters. So the next time someone says something nasty about you, just remember this:

Opinions are like hearts. Everybody has one, but yours is the only one that keeps you going.