A couple nights ago, Dan and I finally were able to sit down and rent Silver Linings Playbook. I know I’ve kind of missed the boat on this one (I’m a new parent, okaaaay?) but, in case you weren’t already aware, it’s a really great movie. For all two of you who haven’t seen it yet, I won’t go into any details, but I will say that Jennifer Lawrence’s character, Tiffany Maxwell, has a lot to teach us in just one quick quote.
There will always be a part of me that is dirty and sloppy, but I like that, just like all the other parts of myself. I can forgive.
– Tiffany Maxwell, Silver Linings Playbook
When I heard her scream out this quote to Bradley Cooper’s character, the hair on my arms stood on end. It was so quick but so powerfully moving, because in just one second she acknowledges that yes, she is imperfect, but she has also forgiven herself for that.
The revolutionary thing here is, because I think the biggest obstacle to forgiving ourselves is remembering the ways we are broken, that Tiffany actually uses her brokenness to foster her own healing. She remembers it, and does so with gratitude that she is not there anymore.
And that’s how chains are broken, friends. When we learn to love all the parts of ourselves, even those parts that will forever be “sloppy and dirty”, and learn to forgive.
A couple years ago, while discussing popular music and culture, a girl in our youth group said something to my husband that, upon his retelling of it, left me dumbfounded. It was something along the lines of, “Demi Lovato is a bad person because she’s in rehab.”
If I would have been around, I would have lost it. I would have said something horrible like, “People like you are the reason that people like Demi Lovato hate themselves.”
Then I would have launched into some sort of theological diatribe about how, technically, we’re all in rehab for SOMETHING and that realizing that you need and want help for your problems should be celebrated and not condemned.
Maybe that’s why I’m not in youth ministry anymore.
But I digress.
Last night I gave in to Cosmo’s temptation and purchased their August issue simply because it has Demi on the cover. It also promised a “shocking” interview with her which… eh.
Shocking probably isn’t the right word. Anyone who has followed Demi’s story (like myself) won’t be shocked. But there was one paragraph that made me stop and mentally high five her.
[Sorry. There's a bit of profanity.]
Underlined emphasis mine.
Damaged people are dangerous. They know they can survive.
– Josephine Hart
This morning my heart is hurting over the loss of Cory Monteith. Not because I knew him (of course I didn’t) but because it, along with living in a city that has been nicknamed “Heaven’s Waiting Room”, is just one more reminder that this life on earth is temporary and fleeting and precious and (sometimes) empty.
But it doesn’t have to be that way.
Each new day is a gift. Even for those of us who may have been dealt a slew of really crappy days in the past, leaving us in what seems like irreparable piles of destruction. Though we may be damaged, we are not yet dead and, therefore, are still capable of overcoming a lot.
Survive, today. Survive today for those, like Cory, who can’t anymore.
Today’s WTLB is actually about writing (squeeee) but I think it can apply to most things. If you are passionate about anything — that is, if you have a soul — I think this quote should resonate with you.
Don’t bend; don’t water it down; don’t try to make it logical; don’t edit your own soul according to the fashion. Rather, follow your most intense obsessions mercilessly.
– Franz Kafka
Have an intense, obsession-driven weekend.
Oh, snap. A WTLB by a good friend.
I want to release this ridiculous notion that to be a successful feminist – or woman – or pastor – or friend - I must fix what is broken. I want my first response to be respect, born of love and listening and honor of every person’s journey. Learn to live in the midst of the mess. See the beauty in the broken…
Embrace the mess, friends. Only in the midst of brokenness can we find true healing. I can say that because I’ve seen it.
Have a messy weekend.
From her phenomenal book, Bossypants.
If you retain nothing else, always remember the most important rule of beauty which is: who cares?
– Tina Fey
Because she’s so hot right now. And because she’s legit.
I’m a woman, that’s living in this world where everybody is telling everybody how they should look and what they should be eating and how people can lose this amount of weight this fast… And it just kind of overwhelms our senses. If I could make the tiniest difference in changing that, because it’s so annoying, I would love that.